


Last Name

by MissBookworm1704



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Accidental Marriage, Clubbing, Drinking, Drunkenness, Las Vegas Wedding, One Night Stands, Songfic, drunk marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-26 18:10:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15668529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissBookworm1704/pseuds/MissBookworm1704
Summary: Hermione goes out to a Muggle club, gets drunk, and ends up in Vegas married to Draco Malfoy. Oneshot songfic to "Last Name" by Carrie Underwood





	Last Name

Hermione took a sip of the very colourful and fruity drink that Ginny insisted she try, although she thought it tasted way too sweet. She gagged it down as she listed in her head the five thousand better things she could be doing on a Friday night like tonight. She could be doing some paperwork for work, reading a good book that's she's read about a million times before, helping Harry reorganize his workspace again (He may be a busy Auror, but it was no excuse for letting everything get so messy), among other things.

But, as fate would have it, Ginny dragged her, Luna, Neville and Harry out to a Muggle club somewhere in the middle of London. Sure, Ginny's birthday was that weekend, but still, she was a busy woman, and didn't have time for spending her evening getting drunk and dancing around like her friends were doing.

When Ginny told them what she was planning for her birthday, Hermione immediately began to protest. Ginny just smiled, put her arm around her shoulder, and said, "Come on, 'Mione, you need to live a little! Have a little fun every once in a while! Stop being so uptight and worrying about work all the time! You're coming, whether you like it or not.". Ginny had a way with convincing people, because here Hermione was, sipping the disgusting rainbow drink because she knew it would make Ginny happy while tuning out the Muggle man who was trying to buy her a drink. She walked away from the bar, abandoning her drink, after the man started touching her in, well, places, and sat down at an empty table. Honestly, this place was giving her a headache from the loud music blaring through the building, and the amount of people there was making her sweat nervously. The coloured lights flashing all over was enough to give one a seizure, and the stench of alcohol made her want to pass out. She tried to spot her friends through the crowded dance floor, eventually spotting Ginny with Harry, dancing very close to each other, Luna was flirting with a cute Muggle (surprisingly), and Neville was back over at the bar, taking a shot of whiskey.

She decided it wouldn't hurt to find a guy and flirt a bit. Besides, she hasn't been with anyone since her and Ronald broke up about a year ago. They just didn't really work together, and parted as friends, although they haven't spoken in about three months. She's heard that he was dating Lavender again, and there were even rumours about a pregnancy. It hurt more as time went on, especially the articles that that filthy little beetle, Rita Skeeter, has published in Witch Weekly. Ginny has been trying to get her to move on and date other men, but it felt like she was betraying him, even though he's already moved on. Well, tonight's a night of trying new things for Hermione, so what harm will a little bit of hitting on do? She decided to make her way back to the bar and check out a few good-looking men over there. She walked up to one, but almost as soon as she arrived, he left to go get another drink with his friend. The next one she went over to appeared to be by himself at first, but she saw a girl next to him, suppressing a moan as he moved his hand under her skirt. Disgusting, thought Hermione.

After what seem like forever, she gave up, and joined Neville at the bar. She plopped down on the bar-stool with a frown. Neville turned his head and smiled slightly at the sight of her.

"What's going on, Hermione? Having fun yet?" He smirked. Hermione sighed.

"Not really. I just want to leave. This place is too crowded."

"I get you. It's a bit too much. Little bit outside my comfort zone." Neville said. Hermione nodded.

"Well, at least the birthday girl's enjoying herself." Hermione said, motioning to a corner, where they could faintly see Ginny and Harry snogging fiercely.

"Yeah, no kidding. Well, there's not point in leaving now. Who knows, you might find someone." Neville nudged her side.

"I've already been trying."

"Don't give up. The night is still young." Neville smiled.

"That's the most un-Neville thing I've ever heard you say. How much have you had to drink, exactly?" Hermione questioned. Neville grinned.

"Let's have a drink. To going outside our comfort zones!" He said as he raised a shot of whiskey. Hermione hesitantly picked up her glass, thought what the hell, connected it to Neville's, then down the drink in one gulp. After all, she was a Gryffindor.

...o0o...

An hour and about 11 shots of whiskey later, Hermione was a completely different person. In her drunken state, she danced around to the loud music, a goofy grin on her face. In the past hour, she had stood on a table, knocking everything off of it, accidentally found herself behind the bar twice, and almost started a fight. She was lucky she wasn't kicked out. Things were getting a little crazy, to say the grabbed Neville's arm and led him back to the bar, where they shared yet another toast.

"To Ne, er, Nettle Pongbottle! The, um, Boy Who Slew, er, some snake thing. Cheers!" Hermione slurred. The two drank once again.

At that same time, three drunk men came into the club, after some evident bar-hopping. Hermione stared at them as they walked up to the bar and got themselves some drinks, especially the tall, white-blonde haired man in the middle of the trio. He seemed familiar, like Hermione had seen him somewhere. She just couldn't think who. He must've noticed her staring at him, because he turned around and threw a smirk at her. She felt her cheeks heat up. His friends, a black man and a tall, weedy looking boy, grabbed their drinks and left, but the blonde stumbled over to Hermione, obviously as drunk as her.

"Hey cutie. Where you from?" He asked. Hermione blushed.

"Umm, eh, I'm from here in London. Northwest London, I think. I can't remember."

"Care to dance?" He said. She nodded, and the two joined the crowded dance floor. Ginny and Harry were nowhere to be seen, more than likely, they Apparated home to, well, have their fun. Neville was talking to Luna, and the two looked like they might kiss for a minute. Her thoughts about her friends were taken away from her when he held her close to him. The two started dancing the night away, letting their bodies move to the music.

She was really liking this guy. He seemed nice and funny. He was really hot, too. During a rather slow song, the two got extremely close to each other, their faces almost touching.

"I never got your name." Hermione said.

"It's Draco." He smirked. She recalled knowing someone named that before, but couldn't quite remember. Oh well.

"I'm Hermione." She said, and sealed the gap between them. The kiss was steamy and quick, yet it left Hermione with a craving for more. She pressed her lips to his once more. This kiss was longer and left Hermione gasping for breath.

"How about we get out of here, baby? Find somewhere more... private." He whispered to her seductively. Hermione just nodded. He led her outside of the club into the parking lot. He pinned her against someone's car as they snogged roughly.

Oh, where did her manners go?

...o0o...

Hermione opened her eyes groggily. She felt very nauseous, and got out of bed to rush to the bathroom. As her feet hit the floor, she froze.

This wasn't her room.

Beige walls, queen-sized bed with white sheets and duvet, massive window with curtains down. This was a Muggle hotel room. She felt herself get chilly as she looked down. She was naked.

What happened last night?

After throwing up in the bathroom, she looked around and found her clothes scattered all around the room and put them back on, everything she was wearing last night was there. Except there was a clump of white fabric on the floor. She picked it up and examined it. To her, it looked like, a wedding dress? As she looked at it more, she noticed something gleaming off of her left hand. She dropped the dress and stared at the ring.

Did she get married? To a stranger? Whoever it was, he must've left long before she woke up.

She walked to the window and threw the curtains open. It didn't look like London. She saw casinos and bars and resorts as far as the eye can see. She looked into the distance and saw a large sign.

Welcome to Fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada, the sign read

What was she doing in America, Vegas of all places? And she was married!

As she looked around, memories slowly started coming back. Ginny's birthday, getting drunk with Neville, dancing with someone, Apparating to Vegas, playing poker in the casino, Elvis for some reason. She knew right then and there she had to get back to Britain. She grabbed her purse, the dress, a pile of chips, and the rest of her belongings. They say what happens here, stays here. That all of this will disappear.

But there's just one little problem.

She doesn't know her last name.

As she gets ready to Apparate, she sees something left on the dresser. It looks like a Ministry of Magic ID card, like the one she used when her, Harry and Ron infiltrated the Ministry during the war. Could her husband be a wizard? She opened the card carefully and screamed at what it said inside.

Draco Malfoy, Auror-in-training

Oh hell no.


End file.
